Evening prayer

The enemy...has crushed my life: Psalm 143, part 1

I’m seated in a comfortable chair in my home office; in 45 minutes I’ll be asleep. But within the remaining minutes of the day, lie anticipated and treasured moments of quiet, solitude and Spirit-breathed grace, as I reflect on and offer up the best and worst of the day: joy and sorrow, courage and fear, on target in word and deed and completely missing the mark; it’s time for the healing and life of evening prayer.

The examen

I’ve always been a big fan of starting the day right, in prayer, devotions and study; and while essential, it’s no more important than bringing closure at the end of the day, by a faithful examination: taking stock of the day’s events, reflecting on God’s presence, thanking him for blessings, acknowledging where you fell short, asking for forgiveness, and asking for grace to make a fresh start in the morning!

Location, location, location

The location of this time of prayer matters to me. My office is a safe place, reminding me of God’s continued leading and guiding in my almost 68 years of life. On one side of the office are photos and plaques representing my military and civilian assignments over 40 years, reminding me of the opportunities, challenges and sacrifices that my family and I faced.

What I feel is humility, given the chance to work with amazing people on some amazing projects; I knew both success and failure but am thankful that I was repeatedly given fresh opportunities to bring my specific gifts and skills to demanding scenarios, raising the bar of performance for my teams and teammates!

On the other side of the office are personal photos—including a photo of my father holding me on the day I was born, elementary school photos of my wife and I, boyhood photos of my brothers and me, and an artist’s rendering of the Sacred heart of Jesus. Immediately outside my office are photos and portraits of our two sons from grade school and high school.

This environment grounds me—I’m so grateful for the reminders of God’s unfailing love through Christ. I am constantly reminded of God’s richest blessings—and the strength he has provided us to endure in time of trial, even enabling us to bless others.

What are you lookin’ at?

My guide in this time of prayer is also important: the daily Catholic Liturgy of the Hours, the Breviary, specifically the evening prayer and night prayer, is a wonderful liturgy including Hymns, the Psalms and other scriptures, writings from the early church fathers, and other prayers.

It’s in last week’s liturgy that I prayed through Psalm 143 and received the “nudge” to write this reflection.

Why Psalm 143?

“Hear my prayer, O Lord; give ear to my supplications! In your faithfulness answer me, in your righteousness! Enter not into judgment…for no man living is righteous before you. For the enemy has pursued me; he has crushed my life to the ground; he has made me sit in darkness like those long dead.” Ps 143: 1-3 NRSV.

Psalm 143 is a Psalm of David, a humble evening prayer for deliverance from enemies. The first thing that struck me about this Psalm was the word “crushed”—and yet the pervasive humility expressed by David in response. Over and over again, starting with his own unworthiness to even approach God, David cries out to God, “…the enemy…has crushed my life to the ground…I remember the days of old…I have fled to you for refuge…let me hear in the morning…in you I put my trust…teach me…lead me…for your namesake!”

And he’s immediately penitential: “no man living is righteous!”

No, not one

David’s more “infamous” Psalm of repentance, following the adultery and murder associated with Bathsheba, brings great clarity and reveals his humility of heart: “have mercy on me according to your merciful love, according to your mercy, blot out my sins…for I know my transgressions.” (Ps 51 NRSV).

David—and we—must appeal to the mercy of God, for it’s against God we have sinned. Or as he puts it in Psalm 130, “If you, O LORD, should mark iniquities, Lord, who could stand? But there is forgiveness with you…for with him is plenteous redemption.” (Ps 130:3,4,7 NRSV)

We may need to reflect on the gravity of our sin. David prayed in Psalm 51 that God “create in me a clean heart,” implying it was only possible for God to do this work, including “restore to me the joy of salvation,” bringing healing to a severed relationship.

Yes, sin’s a big deal…with lasting impact. When God provided the second set of the 10 commandments in Exodus 34, he told Moses that he was “the LORD, the LORD, merciful and gracious…keeping merciful love for thousands,” but would visit the iniquity of the guilty upon the children’s children to the third and fourth generation. Let that sink in…might give you a better and deeper sense of God’s forgiveness, when he “removes our transgressions from us,” as far as the east is from the west…” (Ps 103 NRSV).

Personally, I’ve always kept these words from the Apostle John’s first epistle close at hand:

“…if we walk in the light, as he is in the light…the blood of Jesus cleanses us from all sin. If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves…if we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:7,8,9 NRSV

There we have it…we and David both finding humble security and trusting in deliverance through the faithfulness and righteousness of God!

The top three

David’s evening cry for help—has at least 10 elements highlighting his humility and trust in God that stood out to me. My reflection will be on the “top 3”—but for the overall context—I recommend that you take 1 minute—right now—and read Psalm 143. There’s a good chance other passages in the Psalm will resonate with you as well!

The three passages (and scheduled post dates) we’ll chew on for this reflection are:

1. He has crushed my life (5/7)

2. I remember the days of old… (5/14)

3. …In the morning…your merciful love (5/14)

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1. The enemy is crushing me…

“For the enemy has pursued me; he has crushed my life to the ground; he has made me sit in darkness like those long dead. Therefore, my spirit faints within me; my heart within me is appalled.” Psalm 143:3-4 NRSV

What’s “crushing” you right now?

Lay it down in prayer…As I mentioned earlier, work your evening prayer…walk through the day; do an examen, offer up your “sacrifice” to God.

What’s been your practice of prayer, which reflects your relationship with God? Growth in this relationship is centered in prayer, which prepares us for future challenges!

How has the enemy brought darkness into your life? Where can you find or respond with light? David prayed in Psalm 27 that God was his “light and salvation” and as a result he was able to put away fear. In a similar fashion, David’s Psalm 4 announces God had “given me room when I was in distress.”

After a long day of the enemy’s pursuit, what do you return to in your thoughts?

Remember—”whatever is true, honorable and just, whatever is pure lovely and gracious, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think on these things.” (Phil 4:8 NRSV)

In light of his faithfulness, can you see God’s goodness and presence? Can that sustain you through the long hours of the night? David prayed in Psalm 63 that his “soul was feasted…and his “mouth praised you with joyful lips” as he meditated on God in the “watches of the night.”

And how will you respond to the events of the day, either joy-filled or disastrous? David’s Psalm 25 called out to God, “Unto you, O LORD, I lift up my soul…let me not be ashamed, let not my enemies triumph over me.” Praying this way in the Spirit—is one of putting on the “armor of God,” described by Saint Paul in Ephesians 6. All these Davidic Psalms referenced are a literal picking up of the “Sword of the Spirit”…the Word of God!

The best thing is to lift your hands in prayer, regardless of the brokenness you are experiencing. The most significant growth in our lives often occurs in the wake of a God-ordained crushing by the enemy. Saint Paul referred to his persecution as “light momentary affliction—not worth being compared to the glory of God.” (Rom 8).

Sometimes it seems, God enables and allows the crushing, for correction and instruction in humility, even though we can’t see it yet. David’s Psalm 139 reminds us that God goes before and behind us, his hand is always upon us…such knowledge is too “wonderful!”

For in what ways, either emotionally, physically, or in my thoughts, have I been unfaithful to God, my spouse, my family, or others, for which a consequence is unavoidable?

Is God desiring more of you in the relationship than you’re giving him?

What if it’s not my fault? For the times we are the oppressed, or like Saint Paul, are given a “thorn in the flesh” or “despair” of life itself, to the point we are brought to our knees in weakness, humility, completely dependent on God, who by his loving grace, raises the dead in redemption! Can we trust that no matter what life brings that he will hold us fast?

Or perhaps this is “sculpting” for a future assignment or gift to someone else?

David provides us some insight…perhaps we can change the current outlook by first looking back…in our remembering…and looking forward…to the morning.

Next week:

Part 2, I remember the days of old and in the morning, your steadfast love

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